Chronic pain sucks

Chronic pain plus toxic positivity, gaslighting, misdiagnoses, unsolicited advice, and discrimination sucks even more.

I’m a clinical social worker (a therapist) based near Portland, Oregon. I help professional women (in Portland, Seattle, and throughout both states) who have chronic pain and/or chronic illnesses learn to be kind to themselves, to trust themselves, and to find ways to get the support that they need without ever being forced to prove that their pain is real or that they’re trying hard enough.

My therapy clients struggle as you do. They’re smart, creative, and persistent, but life is hard.

When we meet, they’re often feeling defeated. Even though they know they’re sick, so many people had told them they weren’t actually sick, that they were either “mentally ill” or “just lazy,” that they started to wonder if it’s true.

They’ve tried explaining themselves to numerous doctors, but they always get brushed off or told that all of their symptoms are “anxiety,” even when they never really felt like an anxious person—at least they didn’t before the gaslighting started. Or maybe they finally got an accurate medical diagnosis, but that was the end and they wonder: “Now what?”

They’ve always juggled work and life responsibilities; even though it hasn’t been easy, it often looks that way to other people. When they first come in to see me, they’re struggling to keep up and they feel like they’re letting everyone down—especially themselves.

Their chronic pain and other medical symptoms get in the way of the life they want in so many ways—but not being believed or getting the answers and treatments they need is even worse. They’re tired of hearing “you don’t look sick!” They feel like they’re failing at their friendships. They’re frustrated that they aren’t the kind of partner they want to be. And their confidence at work is falling.

Before they came to see me, they feared they were out of options. They worried coming to see me would mean being told the same thing they’d heard so many times before, without any interest in or understanding of their actual experience: “Think more positive,” “lose weight,” and “just do yoga.” And they were pretty sure they’d never find someone who would believe them.

Like my clients, you deserve to have a doctor’s appointment that doesn’t leave you in tears.

And getting the accommodations and support you need to succeed at work doesn’t have to be totally out of your reach.

If you want to learn to be kind to and trust yourself—to believe that you are not and have never been the problem—I’d love to help you get there.

Click here to get started now. You don’t have to struggle alone. I’m here to help.